Allow Yourself To Be Where You Are

My hubby and I just got home from a church, shopping and a late dinner and took a long walk around our neighborhood. We had been talking throughout dinner, just about life in general, and the conversation turned to what I have learned in therapy role-plays and some of the concepts from my courses. We talked about the concept behind CBT (cognitive behavioral therapy) and how the basic principle is that we are in control of how much we let things affect us. Events in our lives can only affect us as much as we give them permission to. I told him how much I need to apply this concept to my own life; I give external things so much power over me. As we were walking, James (hubby) asked me what kind of changes I would like to see in my life and I told him that I want to be more present,  a "live in the moment kind of thing." He told me that he would like to be more loving towards other people and I asked him what that might look like to get him thinking about more tangible ways that he could apply this. Well, he used the same technique back on me and asked me what it would look like for me to be more present.

Here goes:

• When I complain and rumble about my homework and papers and say I "have" to write this, I need to remember that I do not have to, but I have chosen to. I was so excited to start this program and I am so passionate about the subject matter. Why do I act as if someone is holding a gun to my head telling me to write this paper? Sure, there are consequences if I don't, but do I have to? No. I choose to. From now on when I am working on an assignment I want to be fully invested in it, to choose to do it and be content that I have made this choice, excited even.
• Same thing goes for working out. Have you ever found yourself dreading a workout and counting down the minutes until it was over? WHY?? We aren't forced to work out, we choose to! We like how it makes us feel and look so let's allow ourselves to be there and to enjoy it, not to think about any of our other responsibilities or what we should be doing instead.
• Free time. If I am going to spend the entire time I am out with a loved one thinking of the work that I am sacrificing by being there, then I should not go. If I am going to do something I need to DO it and not mourn the loss of what I am not doing instead. 
• This can also be applied to healthy eating. Why do I want to eat this way, what is it doing for me? Nobody is forcing me to eat anything, there are major benefits to choosing a healthier lifestyle. 

All this to say, allow yourself to be where you are. Try to be present at all moments, to live life for today instead of for a tomorrow that will never come. How much could we increase our happiness and life satisfaction if we gave ourselves fully to our choices. This of course means that we should choose wisely, and if we are choosing wisely than there is no harm in being invested in those choices. This is my advice to myself and I will probably need to be reminded of it quite frequently.

I love walking and talking with my husband. What a nice night!

Who is Ash and what does she know about life?

My husband and I, first anniversary 10/2/11

Hello! I am a 25 years old and currently enrolled in a graduate counseling program with the goal of becoming a licensed marriage and family therapist specializing in eating disorders (anorexia, bulimia, binge eating, and overeating). I want to combine my passion for nutrition and fitness with my passion for helping people and I am so excited to see where this takes me. I have been through the journey of recovering from an eating disorder and I am now on a new journey of discovering how to eat my way into a healthier body, mind and soul. I love trying out recipes from some of my favorite bloggers (anything vegan, low carb or low cal). I am not a vegan, I eat chicken and dairy products, but I love to make my meals as healthy as I can. I recently found out that I have low blood glucose levels which can cause diabetes later in life, this means I have a new interest in a low carb diet that will help me regulate my blood sugar levels. Although I love me some bread, I am learning new ways of eating and it's fun figuring out how to navigate this new territory. The one thing that truly breaks my heart is having to cut down so much on fruit...especially the ever-so-delicious banana. *sigh* I love to exercise and try to switch it up as much as possible, this means in a given week I will do a variation of running, zumba, cardio kickboxing, barre, yoga etc. If I can't make it to a class or to the gym, I stay in my living room and kick it with Tony Horton for a bit (P90X). My husband and I started doing the videos a little less than a year ago and it has been so much fun. We recently acquired the Insanity videos as well...it's a love-hate. We have been married for a year this October (2011) and it has been such a wonderful, growing experience. He is truly an amazing man and I am so, so blessed to have him. So this is my life as I know it. I am trying to make it through graduate school, which is so amazing but very challenging, without sacrificing my other passions. It is quite the balancing act, but so worth it!